Monday, December 1, 2008

HEEEEEYYYY!!!!

Just seeing if anyone is paying attention....

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Mike-isms

Well, this just figures. Once again, the slave of the world has to make all the posts in this series. I may have to resubmit my request for $80,000...or else I am outta here...and you know the rest. Anyway, you know the deal. What are some of my better quips, quotes, and the like? I know I have spewed a lot of inane blather over the years, but I have come up with at least one or two good lines in that time.

So, fire away at me. And, "a belt?!!!" doesn't count, only because I already took it.

Coming soon...we'll go into our offspring. I can think of a bunch for Maria off the top of my head.

Sunday, June 22, 2008

Marge-isms


Now we come to Margaret. Marge is the most educated of us. She has a law degree and works for DPI, so she is using her law degree for good. She is an accomplished artist. She is a great singer. She was an excellent actor. Why, she even was better than horrible at shot-put back in middle school. But, sometimes Marge has been....hmm, how do I put this....less than graceful. Knocking over drinking glasses, losing her glasses in the Puget Sound (I think they are in the picture above), and so on.

OK, so let's have some Marge-isms. Marge, keep in mind that even if some of these end up being too harsh, you can't threaten to call the Kimberly police anymore. It's the Fox Valley Metro Police Department.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Carol-isms

Carol is next. Carol and I just spent several days traveling and hanging out in Colorado (which is another post), so we talked about this a little bit. Carol said that Dad said that she was a very nice girl, but has a mean streak a mile wide. Carol is unbelievably funny, possibly the funniest of us. I think that both of these sentiments are encapsulated in her response to the statement that Marge was like a flower. The response: "Smell her once."

So, let's have some Carol-isms!

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Paul-isms



Now we come to Paul. Paul is known for preferring doctors who share his first name, as well as enjoying large slices of E. He knows the difficulties inherent in being a birdie...because he just knows. But, sometimes he needs a little relief. So, to finally honor the request he made to Marge lo these many years ago, here you go. Some Pepto-Bismol and a big spoon.

OK, folks, it's time for some more of your favorite Paul-isms. Don't worry, if he really gets hurt, he can always fall back on the fortune he is making in his double life as a car dealer in Hobart, Indiana. Paul, a little advice....if you are going to lead a double life, you may not want to use the same name in both of them.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Pat-isms

I got news for you guys...this series is going to continue. Now, we turn to Pat. Pat usually is good for about 550 good one-liners per day. The trick is to remember the best of them. The first one to pop to mind:

"God bless us all, I'm loaded." Now, if that isn't the Heuring/Collar Christmas in a nutshell, I don't know what is.

However, I don't know any good childhood ones for him. See, as I recall Pat usually relays the good one-liner stories, so we don't necessarily get to hear about his 854,224 times like we do with the rest of us.

So, fire away.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Mark-isms

OK, so I want to try to wake this thing up one more time. So, I think it would be fun for us to come up with our favorite lines, one-liners, jokes, and the like from each of us. Of course, we can contribute our own favorites. Each of us will get our turn. Let's start with Mark. We'll finish with me (so you'll have to wait a few posts for "slave of the world").

Here's a couple of Mark-isms to start:
1. Fuick (take the I out, and you have one for all six of us!!)
2. Milk-milk-milk-milk
3. "That and 35 cents will get you a cup of coffee at the student union." This one was said to members of the Lawrence University women's basketball team after they called Mark out on a questioning a call during a Beloit-Lawrence men's basketball game. The women informed Mark they were in first place. The quote above was his response.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Dad's last big joke


The plane shown here is a Cessna 172. A few short weeks before Dad died, he took Marge and me to the EAA Convention in Oshkosh. I thought of this when I was thinking of some good Ed-isms. But, after thinking about this story, I decided to post it. Anyway, at the convention there was a drawing to win a Cessna 172, so Dad entered his name into the drawing. After leaving, we stopped at a Hardee's in Oshkosh before heading back home. It was during this meal when Dad launched what I think was his last big joke. He got Marge and I to play along and tell Dar that we won the plane! We actually convinced Dar and Carol that it happened. We even discussed the possibility of buying out Brown's land to build an airstrip. Marge may have to fill some gaps, but we had them going for a good couple of hours.

Our father the prankster...gee, where do we get it from?

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

The way we were (Darboy edition)

No one's posted here lately, so here's a link to an aerial photo of Railroad/Creekview including our old house (from 1992, so we still lived there). Hey Pat, is it still on the market?

The photo was taken on 5/6/1992. For fun, let's speculate on what may have been happening at the house when that photo was taken.

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

You can take the Butcher out of the country...











But you can't take the Butcher away from the goofballs he left behind!

We couldn't have the annual Pat-Dan-Beccah-Marge birthday party without Butcher. So we decided to bring a few versions of him along.

We had a heck of a lot of fun with it... as you can see!

We miss you Babu! Come home safely, and soon!

Monday, February 4, 2008

Twinkle Twinkle Patrick Star


42 is what you are. Congratulations on reaching the age that is synonymous with the answer to life, the universe and everything.

Maria would be happy to sing "Twinkle Twinkle Patrick Star" to you; well, at least the parts that she remembers. Here it is:

Twinkle twinkle Patrick Star

I made myself a sandwich

It tastes like beans and bacon

My mother makes it fresh

I have a head, it ends in a point

Pointy pointy pointy pointy pointy

P.U.! What's that horrible smell?

That's all she can remember. Hope that your birthday is memorable, too!

Saturday, February 2, 2008

Seven is enough! Let Dick Van Patten have eight.


I want to share with you this photo of the latest, albeit temporary, member of the Eugene St. gaggle. We are providing foster care for Jake and his stay will likely be brief. Ain't that a great mug?
Jake is waiting for his "forever home" to find him. He's come to us via Saving Paws Animal Rescue. In the meantime we'll let him stay at our house and give Rudy LOTS of exercise.

Friday, February 1, 2008

Happy Birthday, Marge!


34 and looking good. I'll try to call you tonight!


Sunday, January 6, 2008

Is this a blog or an oil painting?




You guys still interested in having this blog? We need your wit and wisdom!
Who said what?


"Outside of a dog a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read."
"She came here with stars in her eyes and she left with a bullet in her chest."
"Hey Carol, I know you've got shank sauce."




Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Family Jukebox


Happy New Year, siblings! And to help us bring in the New Year, let's give it up for Adrian Zmed! And remember what Shat (a/k/a T.J. Hooker) said, upon finding a murdered starlet:
She came here with stars in her eyes, and left with a bullet in her chest.


Mike and I are sitting here on his 32nd birthday (my goodness, if he's that old, how old are the rest of us coots?) and we were thinking we need to goose the conversation on this moribund blog. And we don't mean anything related to those frightening Goslings. Pat is still recovering from the headslap he received at Summerfest from the Ganss back in the late 80s. You usually have to go to someplace like Afghanistan to receive comparable post-traumatic stress syndrome, or whatever it's called.


So Mike and I put our tiny little brains together, and we decided we want to talk about music. But this time, we want your recommendations on GOOD SONGS. We don't expect Carol to nominate Talking Heads '77, no matter its merits, but that's okay. Here's the challenge, homeboys and homegirls: we want to set up the family jukebox, or iPod, or whatever other compendium you might choose, of Heuring family tunes. Mike and I are taking the liberty of suggesting a few to get the ball rolling. And we're actually being serious. I know, that hardly seems likely, but hear us out.


So, let's turn it over to Mr. Mike, who throws out the opening pitches.


Mike suggests something by U2. Okay. He starts out with "Pride (In the Name of Love)." A fine selection that I can get behind. Given what today is, I'll follow up with "New Year's Day."


Mike wonders if we all like Prince. Well, we do, so here comes Mike with his suggestion: "When Doves Cry." An excellent choice.


I'll go a totally different direction and suggest "Moondance," by Van Morrison.


Okay, that's a very small start. Let's hear it, troops. What song is it you want to hear? No, we're not trolling for "Freebird" with that question, (or shilling for "Freedom Rock"), although if you want to suggest that, that's fine, too.
The floor is open for nominations.